Stop trying to be the hero…
A lesson in etiquette within a software team
I come from a “do everything myself” background. There used to be nobody to get things done if I couldn’t. Thus, the feeling of personal satisfaction from fixing something “all by myself” has been unchallenged this far in my career.
However, as part of a team I have to rethink what I value more — individual accomplishment, or harmony among my coworkers. If I choose the latter, “I did it” must become “we did it together”. This is a super non-intuitive thing for me, but today’s lesson was a good start.
Scenario: I noticed a bug in my teammate’s code.
I instinctually said nothing, stayed up all night on a solution, and then sent it back to them in the morning along with “Hey I found a bug, thought you might like to see my awesome fix!”
Turns out my eagerness to be the hero actually caused my teammate to feel sidestepped. Furthermore, when they didn’t apply my suggestion, I felt betrayed — leaving us both unhappy. I didn’t notice this until empathy came into the picture: It doesn’t feel good to work hard on something and have someone else try to steal the applause.
How could I have handled this to promote inclusion?
Scenario: I noticed a bug in my teammate’s code.
I instinctually ping them and reveal the bug. The doors to collaboration, cohesion, teamwork, and ultimately harmony are suddenly wide open…
In the end, it’s not about the bug. It’s about honesty and transparency, and being forthright rather than sneaky. Do I have to be the hero, or can I be on a team of heroes?
